What does suicide by affluent people like Chester Bennington teach us?

 

Three things become immediately clear:

  1. Money is not the answer
  2. Fame is not the answer
  3. You cannot fill the void inside by filling your world outside

I was deeply saddened by the news of Chester Beningnton’s untimely death. He is one of the biggest
names around for millennials. We all developed a love for rock through Linkin Park and that is the band
we adored during our early teens.

He was the distinctive voice with which we sang to our heart’s content the blood pumping and inspiring
lyrics of all his songs. My prayers are with him and I wish he finds peace.

My sole reason to write this blog is that I am deeply troubled by the state of our current world. Our entire
world is looking for the answers in the wrong place.

To continue with this topic, I would like to quote Jim Carey first,

“I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of
so they can see that it’s not the answer.”

I would like to start off this discussion of ours with the first question.

 

What do we really want?

We all know that human desires are never ending. The things which we aspired for in the past are now
our everyday liberties, the things which we don’t have now, are our ultimate priorities.

Rich people want to continue making more money, emperor’s and kings kept acquiring new kingdoms,
we get that new car, now we want a home, when we have that home, then we want that amazing
home theatre we always dreamed off, one travel destination after the other, we keep on looking
for that joy outside, which in reality we want to feel inside.

Every time a desire is fulfilled, we get momentary joy, we feel accomplished and it might last for days but it
never lasts forever, with each desire fulfilled the emptiness within us keeps growing, no matter how
much you try to fill it with worldly matters, it keeps on expanding and true satisfaction remains a distant
dream.

The poor or modest man keeps on living in the hope of a better life in the future. Because he thinks improving
his finances and living conditions is the answer, as I do not have it now I am sad and feel unfulfilled.

I must keep working as one day, when I will acquire my means to comfort and prosperity I will be happy.

In this case the poor man is more affluent than the wealthy. He at least has the hope of better living in
the future. Her hopes intact, determined she decides to strive forward, work harder and go forth in an
optimistic manner. As the hope of a better future is still alive.

But what about someone who already has experienced and has everything the material world can offer?
If every physical desire is met and still the void remains undisputed, what hope does one have of finding
happiness ever again by anything else?

The more pressing and tormenting question is “Is there anything else left?”

Sadguru Jagi Vasudev of Isha foundation explains this particular situation very clearly and gives us guidance
with his profound wisdom.

The most important line being,

“Our true nature is infinite and boundless, we are not looking for something. We in reality want everything.”

So if we want everything and want to be everything, then how can we be ever happy with anything less than
The entire cosmos itself? Our desire for expansion is boundless.

Before we proceed further, I would like you to listen to this talk by Sadugur himself over the same topic.

 

The desire for everything, understanding the human predicament

 

 

As humans we are always looking for the final frontier, before wheels it was the land, after ships it was the ocean, after the planes it was the sky and now with rockets we call space our final frontier. One day we might be able to do interstellar travel and by then countless lives would have been gone in vain, cause maybe only then we will realize that the answers we seek are not outside but they lie on the inside.

It’s the same thing over and over again outside, that is what eastern philosophies preach from millennia.

Failing to see the infinite possibility that we humans are and due to unfortunate circumstances the answer to some becomes suicide.

So knowing and understanding this that “What we really want is everything and the path to it is from the inside.”
Can solve multitudes of the problems our modern society now faces.

 

Question 2

How can we fix the outside before fixing the inside?

Modern world has adopted an outwardly outlook about every problem in the world right now.

A lot of people today are so self-indulgent and trying to perfect themselves on the expense of others are opting
for Botox, plastic surgery, synthol and other artificial implants.

Is there a defect in your nose? Are you lips too thin? Or maybe your skin color is not exactly how you want it to
be? More importantly, who set the standards for beauty and normality? So is the defect in how you look and
feel? Or it’s in how you think about it and your whole ideology about how the world is supposed to work?

No matter how expensive the clothes you wear, how beautiful they look and no matter how extravagantly you
accessorize your entire wardrobe, you won’t feel good or look beautiful unless you feel that way about
yourself on the inside.

No matter how elaborately you plan, build and decorate your house, you won’t feel at home and at peace, unless you feel that way within yourself.

Therefore they say “Home is a feeling and not a place.” Everyday quotes or sayings have so much meaning if
we truly just pay attention to them and assimilate them in our lives.

Rather than working for that body, by exercising, eating right and being consistent, they just want to pay the money and get implants for looking perfect. But what is perfect really?

Perfect is an illusion created by the demons of your own mind. It’s focusing more on how you look than how you feel.

 

This is the age of instant gratification.

 

Instead of taking the holistic approach to proper health, strong body and healthy mind, people just want to look the part don’t want to be the part or do the part.

This ideology that the fix is somewhere outside, is harming the world in a major way.

Instead of making things happen, people want things to happen to them. People can watch sports for hours on TV, but how many of them are really eager to be on the field a lot of times?

Everyone wants to be pleasured where they are without doing anything but nobody really wants to work for that sense of accomplishment and happiness.

People are ready to consume intoxicating substances to either numb their mind or feel euphoric, without taking time to self-introspect and find the real cause of the problem within or finding that peace and joy with some purpose.

Before running a proper mile, people are ready to consume fat burners or follow fad diets which guarantee quick results.
The only thing people are putting effort into is making money and consider it to be the solution to everything.

Our commerce driven world, our capitalist world is portrayed in such a way that pay money and get what you want.

An intellectual and spiritual reform is much needed in today’s world, here is how we can start exploring that path:
  1. Try to find the purpose of what and why you are doing something.
  2. Know that all change starts with you
  3. Think of the bigger picture, think long term
  4. Consider everything’s benefits and repercussions in the long run
  5. Find your purpose and see if your current endeavors have any?
  6. First fix your mindset about something, before trying to fix something outside
  7. People’s opinions matter only when they are done in good faith and are constructive

Take responsibility

The moment something is wrong with our body or mind we look towards medication as the answer. In severe
cases some support is definitely required but it isn’t the ultimate solution.

The ultimate solution is taking responsibility of your own mind and body. Think about your current lifestyle, your impulsive habits, your self-indulgent behavior and most importantly self-sabotaging traits.

Mindless eating, unthoughtful drinking, uneven sleep patterns and a very sedentary lifestyle.

It’s not okay just because it’s normal. If everybody is doing it, does not make it useful. Feeling sorry for yourself
is well and good but to think logically, I know it’s difficult in certain situations, I have been through a lot of those, but we must take a wholesome perspective at life. What good feeling sorry for yourself does?

We live in such a fast paced world this days, you personally don’t even have time to actively take care of yourself.
If you are expecting people to take care of you and take notice of your misery, then you are not thinking straight.

You must understand that everything you consume, may it be media, food or air it becomes a part of you.

So without first fixing your lifestyle consciously, if you mindlessly pop pills here and there, always look for help
elsewhere than at yourself, you are becoming unconsciously dependent on everything. You have lost your
freedom of life.

The proverb we all read as kids:
“God helps those, who help themselves.”

Is the ultimate truth. The question isn’t if you believe in God or not. But the answer is you definitely need to
lift yourself up, if you want to make something remarkable out of your life.

I know it’s too much work and very difficult,

But you must come to in terms with it if you truly want to live a free and powerful life. If you want to achieve
all your goals, if you want to make life worth living.

Become the strength you sometimes needed from somewhere else, Become the giver than the taker.
Be strong for yourself and your people. Take responsibility of your own life and become the messenger of
holistic change. You have the power in you, you just need to decide, that from today onwards,

“The world can depend on me but I myself will become the self-fulfilled.”

Check what you eat, see how you sleep, think about what you read, watch and listen. Make qualitative
judgments about the kind of content you are feeding yourself. Question yourself, “Whether what you just
saw or read or listened to, empowers you or saps you off your precious energy and time?”

Stabilize your environment. Keep it clean, well-organized and serene. I personally love minimalism, I think its
a sign of a sound mind. The more cluttered your environment is, the more chaotic your mind will be.

Start exercising, do some pranayama, align your energies. Don’t look for your dopamine shot externally, you
can generate it in healthy amounts yourself, in a way which will benefit you for your entire life.

Check out this talk on Big think about how much time and money people spend trying to achieve a heightened
state of consciousness and experience via external sources of dopamine.

 

How we chase Dopamine: Porn, social media and Alcohol |Steven Kotler

 

After that become aware and shift your sources to natural and meaningful places.
If you do just this, I think medication and visits to a doctor’s clinic will become a long lost memory. Yes! Please
go consult an expert if you think it’s a pressing matter but don’t pet a habit of doing so even before you have
educated yourself and learnt to take care of yourself fully and mastered taking responsibility for all your states.

We are a living, breathing organism. All those factors mentioned above affect the quality of our life

Keeping them in place ensures:

  1. A state of well-being
  2. A state of positivity and internal motivation
  3. Feeling purposeful
  4. Growth as a human being year after year
  5. Overall life satisfaction

About feeling purposeful I would like to add:

  1. Don’t find your purpose in gossip
  2. Don’t find your purpose in animosity
  3. Don’t find your purpose in competition
  4. Don’t find your purpose in material possession
  5. Don’t find your purpose in superficiality

Then where can we find our purpose:

  1. Find your purpose in meaning
  2. Find your purpose in equality
  3. Find your purpose in humbleness
  4. Find your purpose in wisdom
  5. Find your purpose in depth of your being

View this talk from Big think, which explains the science of happiness, motivation, and meaning.

 

The science of happiness, motivation and meaning | Dan Ariely

 

As you see if you want to persevere and do more, meaning is very important.

 

Before we proceed further, here’s another talk by Sadguru about the purpose of our life, watch, then continue.

 

What is the purpose of life?

Understand this, humans cannot live or survive without a purpose. The moment someone does not see a purpose in being alive, they either are hopelessly depressed for life or decide to commit suicide. As mentioned by Sadguru, if there is a so called purpose, then it’s to experience and know life in its totality.

This brings me to the most important point of our discussion, the path of service.

 

3. If you cannot live for yourself, then don’t commit suicide, live for the service of others

Even though this blog is for everyone, I especially want to address those, who are suffering from severe depression and suicidal thoughts. Never before was I shook so hard by the demise of a celebrity as that I am by the untimely passing of Chester Bennington.

It opened me up to the possibility of so many people suffering from similar instances throughout the world. In our everyday life, we might not come across such individuals, but a message for change and a call for change has nonetheless been demanded cause of this incidence from within me.

I am moved and I want to reach out, through this website I have the power to reach out to thousands of people
across the globe in words, and if these words awaken a sense of responsibility even in a single person, this post is worth it. Because that one person, If she is suffering from something similar or knows someone who is suffering in a similar fashion, will try to be the helping hand in the time of need.

So even after nailing good exercise in thought and action, after eating right and on time with the adequate nutrients, sleeping on time and sound, after exercising your breath through pranayama and balancing your energies and finally after practicing discipline in thought, words and information, purposeful and quality knowledge, inspiring content.

Still you don’t feel uplifted and purposeful and have still retained the uninspired, unfulfilled demeanor about
yourself, then it’s time to look beyond yourself now.

It’s time for service.

 

Mahatma Gandhi in his autobiography “My experiments with truth” says:

“Service which is rendered without joy helps neither the servant nor the served. But all other pleasures and possessions pale into nothingness before service which is rendered in a spirit of joy.”

 

Now service is for everyone, the quote we read as kids again:
“Charity begins at home.”

It’s the testament to it. This is the need of the hour in our current world. We all looking out for each other, we as an intellectual species looking out for nature and other animals. Our intellect is a great power and what does uncle Ben say’s in spider man “With great power comes great responsibility.”

It’s time for a collective consciousness. It’s time we come together to fix our world together. We have the power.
If all of us decide today, that this world needs to change for the better, that every living creature on earth deserves the right to live and prosper, we will create heaven on earth. As one big family, we will be the testimony to the magnificence of life.

So let the charity begin at home, be that helping hand at home, be that caring presence in your family’s life. Be
that mountain of support for everyone around you and you will find joy and solace being that, I am quite sure
of it.

Do some volunteering if you are feeling fantastically generous. Be that ray of hope for someone else when
everything seems lost. It will be difficult, it will demand a lot from you and it might leave some after effects
on you but you must become strong enough to dust it off, it’s your duty to fortify yourself and you can
do that by doing everything that I mentioned in the point “Take responsibility.”

That’s how in the service of others and Mother Nature you will find your purpose for time being, until
mother nature decides that it’s time for you to know your ultimate purpose.

This will be your ray of hope, your source of peace, joy and fulfillment. When we look beyond ourselves
that is when we realize how beautiful life is, the strength you will gain by living like this is incomprehensible.

Be that smile of purpose in the gloom of hopelessness. Spread the light.

 

Conclusion

The number one thing we should really try to find is “What do we really want?” as explained in the video
our true nature is limitless and any answer below everything will not suffice. Through my life experiences
and the kind of environment I was brought up in my inclination is towards spirituality and I think that
is the source through which we will get a definite answer.

I suggest you to read this two books “An autobiography of a Yogi by Yogananda.” And Inner engineering by Sadguru Jaggi Vasudev, I have derived some great value from both this books, I am sure you will too.

Try, discarding something even before trying it is the biggest obstacle to growth. Try, if you don’t find it
useful move on.

Second important point is, take responsibility of your life. Before fixing the outside fix the inside.
Improve your mindset about something, bring about a reform in your ideology before thinking of
committing to a physical change. Look for the meaning in it all.

Take care of your mind, body and spirit to its fullest.

Third important point is service. Long term satisfaction is in working for something bigger than yourself.
It might take time to fully come to in terms with it but you can begin your charity at home. Once you
feel ready to venture into the world, offer your service there.

All your opinions, suggestions and insights over this are most welcomed in the comments section below.
Please do let me know, if you agree with all that I wrote or not. Eager to read from you.